Faster, Faster, Don't Stop Now

Things That Are Awesome

1. Planned Thanksgiving dinner for the family with my grandmother last night in 7 minutes. From start of planning to when everyone knew what they were making (as calling people takes longer than that): 25 minutes.

2. This weekend, because the race was boring and bubblesbrnaid was not with me (wails), I wrote three cover letters that are customizable.

3. Today's lunch is (supposedly) great Asian. I've already looked at the menu and they do have Thai (but lots of Chinese, ick), so I'm good. I hope.

4. I have found several recipes for Pad Kee Mao (Drunken Noodles). I'm hoping to make some over Thanksgiving.

5. tenel will be in town tomorrow.

6. Yuletide research is going well.

Things That Are Not Awesome

1. On the first day of wearing my new boots, the boss wants me to deliver something. Four blocks down the street and over railroad tracks. Which is why I now have a swollen ankle from rolling it. And I had to wear flats and a brace.

2. PMS is making me a hungry bitch. I've put on 4 pounds in the last few days.

3. My sister wants me to go out for her birthday. Of course she schedules it for THIS weekend, when I already have plans (as tenel, bubblesbrnaid and eliz are way more awesome than my sister). What you want to bet she'll be distant and bitchy to me at Thanksgiving because I said no?

4. My grandmother weasled the green beans away from me for Thanksgiving dinner. Our hope was to avoid her cooking too much AND that the green beans would be the way we like them (my mother and I like them juicy, but my grandmother cooks the water out of them).

5. My dog is being particularly annoying lately. He sniffs everything on his walks, which leads to me freezing my butt off or having to drag him back inside.

6. And my freaking carpal tunnel is acting up. *headdesk* Why the hell is my left hand killing me when I've been good to it of late?

How To Piss Me Off When I Have PMS

1. Ask to hold for someone on the phone.
2. In a snotty manner.
3. Reiterate that you're a client - albeit a client that only has a project for us once every three years.
4. In a snotty manner.
5. Tell me it's vitally important - even though every time you call (once every 6 months) it's vitally important.
6. In a snotty manner.
7. Call right when I'm getting ready to run to the rest room.
8. Thereby tying me to the desk until you get off.
9. Hold for 10 minutes.
10. Snottily ask for the other partner in the agency.
11. Get even snottier when she's in a meeting.
12. Get downright pissy while I take your number so the bossman can call you back.

Yay me, I didn't hang up on him once.

A bit of war commentary here.

So, for everyone who knows nothing about PMS, or for those lucky bastards who get off with very mild PMS, let me just give you the low-down on the nastiness that is PMS.

1. Water retention
2. Bloating
3. Cramps
4. Moodiness
5. Bitchiness (not to be confused with Moodiness, which is the changing of moods, Bitchiness is one mood and a scary one at that)
6. Extreme hunger
7. No hunger at all
8. Tenderness
9. Sensitivity to (but not limited to): light, sound, criticism, touch, wind, rabbits, food, harsh fabrics, smells, men, children, Hallmark commercials, movies with animals that die, movies with anyone that dies, Reader's Digest, band aids, and family members
10. Lethargy
11. Insomnia
12. Various aches and pains in the back, stomach, lower abdomen region
13. A desperate hatred of all those who can claim the honor of not having a period