Faster, Faster, Don't Stop Now

luvinthe88and20 provides the visual evidence...

Jimmie Johnson gets a makeover.

If by "makeover" one means "Mears apparently sent Jimmie to his old barber and Raoul got hacked to death."

NASCAR Chase Edition Fun

1. That fight between Tony and Zippy was kind of astounding. I think they also fought after the end of the race, as Tony was awfully subdued and positive when he was interviewed.

2. Casey Mears commercial! With Casey! Talking! Okay, with hair, but CASEY.

3. Hornish hits many things again. Surprise!

4. Bubbles keeps singing stuffs. A lot.

5. Kyle spinning off of Junior's bumper. And Junior taking responsibility for it even though it still might not have quite been his fault.



And now time to walk the dog and procrastinate until the Nationwide race starts. We've had pizza. Now the "exercise".

Random Picspam: New Hampshire Edition

NASCAR picspam! Because really, who would have thought that New Hampshire would provide the most awesome of all awesome pictures?

(And the cheesetastic picture of Truex trying to be the official cheesey snack of NASCAR is not included. Mainly because it's everywhere. You can't miss it.)

( Here be kissing, wet t-shirts, bad hair, and FoxSports Slash! )

***

In Other Sports News

1. Olympics trials are of the awesome.
2. The dang Visa commercial with the guy breaking down and his daddy helping him makes me cry.
3. And the Yankees/Furries story is entirely too entertaining for words.

Second half of Hendrick round table.

Including Casey Mears in the jeans and shirt with forearms and...

*falls off chair*

Or it's the first part. I'm not sure. Either way, Casey and the jeans and the shirt and the forearms and...

*falls off chair again*

Things that are awesome about NASCAR and the Daytona 500

1. When guys who've never won the 500 win. Which, I think, of the top 10...was about nine of them. LOL So I would have been happy if any of the top 10 had won. (Well, since Junior was the one who'd won previously...)

2. Newman's wife with the crying. (Plus the fact that she wasn't "camera ready" like all other NASCAR wives tend to be.)

3. Newman's dad and the tackling.

4. The fact that Jeff Gordon is now from North Carolina.

5. The Toyota commercial. Tony is so cutely protective of Zippy. And Shrub screams well.

6. Guys with deep voices. Dave Blaney, Martin Truex Jr., Casey Mears...the fourth guy that I can't remember at the moment. There were four really, really deep voices in that startling lineup that FOX did and boy, did I blink when they talked. (You never quite realize how deep their voices are until they're up against one another. Plus I realized that my hearing really sucks and deep voices I can hear better.)

7. Junior with the funny perspective. Talking about how those Penske guys worked together to get that win and everyone else was in it for themselves, himself included. (Of course, he's allowed to be funny about those things. He has a 500 win. And his season is already better than last year.)

8. DW tearing up at the beginning. One reason I like the FOX crew better - the ones who weren't aiming to be announcers from the time they were five don't pretend they weren't in the sport before they were announcers. Yeah, Hammond gets on my nerves sometimes, but there's a balance between them all and they know they're connected to the sport in a way that's different from other announcers who just announce.

9. National anthems that are in tune and sung well.

10. Nothing is better than the roar of those engines firing up.

11. Explaining to a coworker that the great thing about my sport is that I root for more than one guy, and a good day doesn't necessarily equal a win. So it's hard to have a bad race. (Unless I'm there in person and yet again someone I don't root for wins. For some reason it's different in person. You feel like if you paid the money, you should get to see one of your favorites win. Believe me - I've seen the following win in person: Mark Martin, Jimmie Johnson, Matt Kenseth, Tony Stewart - and you want the guy you're rabid about right at that moment to win.)

Sometimes things don't make any sense. These pictures are evidence of those things.

One of These Things Is Not Like the Other

( Waiting for the fighting to start )

Another picspam for the viewing pleasure.

It's Teammate Time!

( A plethora of the boys be found under here. )

This is a catch-all post. Things are shorter than I want, but I'll never post otherwise, so...

My Sister's Boobs

She made me poke them. Luckily she did not flash me. But I poked the top edge of her fake boobs. She lied when she said she didn't go too big. They're a small C. Her skin is way too stretched and they're very stiff. And she had them covered. All this I could tell with them covered.

NASCAR

Yay for Mears! Yay for Truex! I like when guys win who haven't won before. Tis awesome.

I especially love when guys win in their sophomore season or later. For some reason, when rookies win I feel like they don't have as fine of an appreciation for it as the other guys do. Granted, if they don't win their rookie season they tend to end up as one of those drivers with a solid career, but not a superstar, so...

And randomly, dear Tony Stewart, please stop talking about your relationship with Zippy and saying "It's like we're married." Because seriously, I'll take you two to Canada if you want. Just to see who'd get to be the husband. (Something Tony said on Trackside for some reason makes me think that Zippy gets to be the husband.) We'll ignore the part where Zip is already married.

NEXTEL Pit Crew Challenge

Most importantly: the pit crews are ten million kinds of awesome and TV fails to capture their awesomeness. Those men bust their asses getting up and down that arena for the competition. They do things they don't normally do (run 40 yards, push a car - well, they don't do that if they're not Newman's crew). They for once get spotlighted for the training they go through. In a word, they RULE.

Many apologies to the amazing eyesight of bubblesbrnaid for doubting that it was in fact Matt Borland sitting a couple rows back and half a row down. *headdesk* You'd think after spotting his shining silver hair from a distance at Penske that I could spot him in profile much closer. Turns out...I can't.

Newman's crew won. They were good. Timewise, there was only one other team close, and that was the 83 team. Sadly, Newman's crew called out the Red Bull team (full time pit crew guys who do it 7 days a week) in the third round and beat them there. Third best team all night long was the 43 crew, though, so much love to Bobby's team for giving it all they had.

Bobby Labonte waved at me. *g* That's my story and I'm sticking to it. (Hey, I yelled REALLY LOUDLY when everyone else was quiet and he turned and waved in our direction. So you know, that was for me.)

Jeff Gordon is seriously short, but he looks oddly good with scruff.

Doug Richert is love. So is Vickers.

I will always root for a team if their driver shows up to support them. Especially if the driver gets in the car and steers. (Hence the fact that I was rooting for Kyle Busch at one point.)

Bobby Labonte has a whole lotta stuff in his pockets. Seriously. Every pants pocket was filled with stuff.

This post is all NASCAR, brought to you by Bojangles'.

NASCAR Neurosis

This moment is dedicated to celli and tenel, who will undoubtedly laugh their asses off.

This morning, while getting dressed, I had a moment of horror. I had my hose on and made the move to put on my bra. So, essentially, I'm standing in my bedroom half naked (not nekkid, as nothing untoward was going on). The TV is on to the morning news. Just as I'm going to put on the bra I look up to see Jeff Gordon on my TV screen, grinning and giving me the thumbs up. My first reaction? To shriek and cover my boobs.

So lesson learned - I don't want Gordon seeing me naked. It's skeevy.

The commercial in question is part of this campaign.

The Vickers Complex

Vickers video that makes me giggle like whoa. Also known as, riding a half-pipe in a rolling desk chair. WITH helmet.

Yeah, I may have watched that five times already.

Also, something tells me some of the quotes from the Hendrick camp in here were from Jimmie and Jeffy, not from Kyle.

"Vickers' former teammates quietly suggest he hadn't appeared to change much since joining the team at the behest of team-owner Rick Hendrick's late son, Ricky, in 2003 and that he was content being a kid."

Because a couple of 30-somethings have SO much in common with a 23-year-old. And are at the same point in their lives. Methinks asking Kyle would have been a better option.

Stealing Harvick

From Jayski:

Don't have a ton of details on this, but heard from sources at the track that someone broke into the #29 RCR garage this morning at Atlanta Motor Speedway, taking Kevin Harvick's helmet and was supposedly caught climbing a fence with the helmet on, no word on any other items taken or any damage by the person.

UPDATE: Daytona 500 winner Kevin Harvick's helmet was stolen from the #29 hauler in the Nextel Cup garage Sunday morning. But the caper was quickly foiled by speedway security. "[NASCAR] was notified early this morning that track security had come across and apprehended two individuals in the garage who were in the possession of Kevin Harvick's racing helmet," NASCAR spokesperson Kerry Tharp said. "The police were notified, the individuals were arrested and the helmet was returned safe and sound."

Testing

Kyle Busch and Casey Mears are testing COTs at Caraway Speedway tomorrow. The squeal you heard from me is over 1) drivers that close to where I live (Caraway is just outside Asheboro), 2) COT that close to me (I wanna see one) and 3) the idea of those two in an isolated place, because Casey could hurt Kyle and no one would be the wiser. What? I'm sadistic.

Unfortunate Wording Leads To Slash

Team Red Bull is notorious for the parties it throws in Formula One, and Vegas gave the team a proper venue for its first NASCAR celebration. The first-year NASCAR team rented out the Hugh Hefner Sky Villa at Palms Casino, then put together an exclusive guest list for the seven-hour bash. The doors opened at 9 p.m., and NASCAR president Mike Helton made his brief appearance shortly thereafter. Drivers Greg Biffle and David Gilliland were also among the first on the scene - as well as the last to leave. Johnson and wife, Chandra, arrived with driver Casey Mears, while Kasey Kahne showed up with Elliott Sadler.

So Jimmie and Chandra have a threesome going with Mears and Sadler is Kahne's bitch? The HELL?

Simon Cowell Gets Judged - By Michael Waltrip and Kurt Busch

Oh, and Mario Andretti. But he doesn't count as I'm female, therefore I don't exist.

Simon Cowell Gets Judged video.

The judging starts about 2:41. Mikey goes all out at being extra snarky.

ETA: Newman Surprise

Shocking Newman Video!!!!

He has a neck! Oh, and he surprises a fan at an Alltel store. The fan, being of the NASCAR redneck variety, is awesome and reacts like he's supposed to, with yelling, declarations of "I'm shaking like a leaf", and bowing.

Yeah, I said bowing.