Want to buy your scooter for $800?

Tales From The Apartment Complex; Also Known As Tales of Stupid Criminals

Monday: Just before 2 a.m., someone steals Billy's motorscooter. (Hey, it gets 150 miles to the gallon. I'd have one if I didn't have a 30 mile drive to work.)

Tuesday: Through discussions with various neighbors, Billy gets wind of who may have taken it. (Of course, due to local law enforcement not being willing to do any actual leg work themselves, they will not investigate.) Billy also gets wind that said perp is young and may be on probation. Billy is wily, so Billy calls a buddy of his who is a probation officer to verify this info. Info is correct. Definitely on probation. So Billy gets word to the perp that he knows he took the motorscooter and wants it back or the cops shall be sicced. Perp comes over and tries to sell Billy the scooter (his own scooter) for $800. Billy is not amused. Perp leaves.

Wednesday: Since the perp actually tried to sell it back, it proves that the perp has the scooter. Which means Billy can call the law. Billy gives the kid one more chance, though (nice guy, our Billy) to give back the scooter. Billy flat out told the guy that he wouldn't press charges if he just returned it. Guy shows up at 9:30 p.m. and returns the scooter...but not before trying to get Billy to hand over money for it. Again.

So in conclusion, the scooter is returned, Billy is not out any money, and the idiot is still on the loose without really having learned a lesson. Thanks to the police department for being ever so nice and actually investigating the dang crime.

Can you dance?

I'm trying to break up a massive proofreading project with online stuff. Cause that's how I roll. (Okay, so my eyes have been crossing. And watching TV online breaks up the monotony.)

So I'm watching the performances of So You Think You Can Dance today, thanks to a ballgame last night. (101 degrees out and we're at a ballgame. Fun! Not.)

( Sabra and Neil )

( Lauren and Danny )

( Lacey and Pasha )

Newsflash!

Breaking News

I'm officially a Ryan Newman fan.

As a Ryan Newman fan I will:

1. Gladly forgive all on-track incidents that are stupid.
2. Overlook his penchant for racing too hard too early in a race.
3. Ignore when he's a lap car and racing a lead lap car like it's for position.
4. Let him wreck at least one of my other guys once this year without cussing at him.

Why?

Cause while Biffle went all logical and pissed over the Michael Vick dog fighting case, Newman just went apeshit.

Best part?

They'll (Newman and his wife, Krissie) call some attention to it (the case) themselves by sporting the t-shirts they had made last week that say: "7 to life" on the front and "Neuter Vick" on the back, which Krissie says Ryan will wear through the end of the season.

*falls over and falls in love*