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Bad News Maveness
Just for the record, if I'm a super raving bitch tomorrow at work, it's not my fault.
It's the fault of the motorcyclist running from the cops. The one who decided the most awesomest hidey hole was MY PATIO.
All I know is, there are things that add up very badly.
1. Dog barking psychotically in that tone that says "evil person** on the patio!" +
2. Swinging bird feeder when birds are all asleep and bird feeder is five feet off hte ground and therefore not going to be bumped into by a tall dog +
3. Statement by cop that someone is running from them in our apartment complex.
This equals "guess what genius decided my patio was the perfect place to hide". Great. My dog is on edge. I'm on edge. I have a "just got to sleep thirty minutes ago" headache and an overload of adrenaline. Freaking fabulous. I'm SO sleeping with the lights on tonight.
(Behind my apartment building - which I'm on the back side of and first floor - is really dark, with a very, very large hedge that goes the length of half the apartment complex. So it's very dark and secluded. Great for hiding from cops.)
Luckily I have the Intimidator (my bat bought last time someone thought my apartment looked awesome at 2 a.m.) and a really nasty attitude, should anyone try to get in. The great thing is, my patio is impossible to get in at. The safety bar is impenetrable. The front deadbolt is pretty solid. And I'm thinking Junior is getting ready to get repositioned for maximum scariness.
* Um, it may be important to note that upon realizing that someone was on my patio, and that calling 911 was in order, I kind of got up, grabbed my bat and my cell phone, and started yelling "It's ON bitch!" Seriously. I like my sleep.
** My dog really doesn't like the lawncare guys or the maintenance guys because they come on "his" property while I'm at work. So when someone he doesn't know comes up on the patio like the lawncare guys, he gets kind of barky, but with a sharper edge and more growl than when he sees a bunny.
Just for the record, if I'm a super raving bitch tomorrow at work, it's not my fault.
It's the fault of the motorcyclist running from the cops. The one who decided the most awesomest hidey hole was MY PATIO.
All I know is, there are things that add up very badly.
1. Dog barking psychotically in that tone that says "evil person** on the patio!" +
2. Swinging bird feeder when birds are all asleep and bird feeder is five feet off hte ground and therefore not going to be bumped into by a tall dog +
3. Statement by cop that someone is running from them in our apartment complex.
This equals "guess what genius decided my patio was the perfect place to hide". Great. My dog is on edge. I'm on edge. I have a "just got to sleep thirty minutes ago" headache and an overload of adrenaline. Freaking fabulous. I'm SO sleeping with the lights on tonight.
(Behind my apartment building - which I'm on the back side of and first floor - is really dark, with a very, very large hedge that goes the length of half the apartment complex. So it's very dark and secluded. Great for hiding from cops.)
Luckily I have the Intimidator (my bat bought last time someone thought my apartment looked awesome at 2 a.m.) and a really nasty attitude, should anyone try to get in. The great thing is, my patio is impossible to get in at. The safety bar is impenetrable. The front deadbolt is pretty solid. And I'm thinking Junior is getting ready to get repositioned for maximum scariness.
* Um, it may be important to note that upon realizing that someone was on my patio, and that calling 911 was in order, I kind of got up, grabbed my bat and my cell phone, and started yelling "It's ON bitch!" Seriously. I like my sleep.
** My dog really doesn't like the lawncare guys or the maintenance guys because they come on "his" property while I'm at work. So when someone he doesn't know comes up on the patio like the lawncare guys, he gets kind of barky, but with a sharper edge and more growl than when he sees a bunny.
